Phasmatis Ex Machina
by The Fox Knight
Summary: What do you wish for? Wealth? Glory? Power? Keep in mind that a price is required. When a young girl is asked what she wishes for, her answer is simple; "I want to live." The price for that wish is to win the Holy Grail War.
1. Ortus (Beginning)

**This is a rewrite from my original story.**

**I own nothing. Everything belongs to Type-Moon.**

* * *

**_What you see here, is your false home._**

**_What you see there, is a blank look._**

**_What I see, is sadness repeating._**

* * *

**Morning**

I always awaken very abruptly. I don't even think I dream. I suddenly find myself walking to school. My headache worsens day by day, until it finally buzzes in my head like an alarm. That day. In potent numbness, I wake up twice as fast as normal.

I walk to the schoolyard. It's clear and cloudless, 7:30 A.M. But… what season is it…? When I try to recall what season it is, I start to get so dizzy I almost pass out. I may wind up back in bed if I let go and faint. For some time, I have been embracing a rush of useless information. The normal stuff you'd see at a school, like the hustle and bustle of my classmates by the entrance.

It hasn't changed.

It hasn't changed.

When I push the thought, my field of vision fizzles.

Today/**Again today**, there's a crowd of students milling in front of the school gate, and more are being directed that way. As to what's going on, there's a boy in front of the school gate. He's my friend/**as a recall.** He's Issei Ryuudo/**as I recall.** I remember this the first time.

When Issei notices me looking at him, he pushes through the crowd. "Good morning! Lovely weather we're having, don't you think? Hmm? Why do you look so surprised? We announced at last week's assembly that this month the student council would strictly enforce school rules." He runs through his spiel, as if this was the first time he'd ever disclosed the information.

I already know this.

I know it.

I already know what happens.

It's happened more than once.

I'm seized by a headache. I'm so dizzy I feel like I'm forcibly logged out of my consciousness.

Issei continued speaking, "First, let me check your student ID. I shouldn't have to remind you, but it should be on you at all times." My log-in ID is being checked. It's so obvious now. I answer clearly to the question that usually makes me so dizzy.

**Name:** Ailita Furude

**Age:** 17

**Gender:** Female

**Nickname:** Lita

Issei looks over my ID. "Great. There's no telling when an emergency might occur, and it will be a help if you have your ID."

I feel nauseous, and I know it has nothing to do with what I ate for breakfast this morning. I feel nauseous because of the world around me. Its repeating itself over and over, and that's making me sick.

"Now for the uniform inspection. Collar, check! Pant hems, check! And your socks… check!"

I want him to get out of my way. I want this repetition to stop. I push Issei aside without even waiting for him to finish speaking, and rush forward. I'm not nice about it either.

"Next is the contents of your bag… Notebooks, textbooks, pencil box! Not even a whiff of contraband. Your nails are evenly cut, and your haircut is sensible. Indeed, quite remarkable. You're a model Tsukumihara Academy student." He keeps on talking loudly, even though he's facing no one. It's like he's just a recording.

I have a headache. I'm shivering. I know one thing for sure. This is wrong. This is not the school I know! It can't be! I have to go. I have to hurry and wake up. Or else it will be too late. But, who am I… waking up for…?

* * *

**Evening**

Class is over and most of the students are gone. My anxiety and headaches are only getting worse. Afternoon arrives while I desperately try to find a way to escape this bizarre situation. As is now the norm, my vision is overlaid with some kind of unnatural distortion.

Uneasiness.

Futility.

Emptiness.

I want someone to explain to me the true nature behind all of these feelings. There must be a key somewhere. Something that will have the answers to all of my questions.

Since I didn't even know where to start looking, I randomly decided to go downstairs. The moment I step foot on the first floor, my feelings of unease intensify. There is a student wearing a red uniform. Leo, the new transfer student. The instant I lay eyes on him, I immediately feel intimidated and humiliated. There is also someone trailing behind him. It looks like… one of my classmates… I think. The more I think, the more I realize that Leo isn't the only anomaly I've come across while on campus. There are other things that seem… off… as well.

It's becoming clearer now. There are people who shouldn't exist. Students that mysteriously vanish. The fabric of reality is coming unraveled.

Don't turn away now.

What is the 'truth'?"

Don't turn away now.

What defines the world you know?

Don't turn away now.

There is a reason why you're here.

Come. Do not allow yourself to close your eyes to the truth.

Out of curiosity I follow the two boys down the hall. Leo and one of the guys from my class are talking in the hallway up head. I try to stay out of sight and hide behind a corner.

Leo starts talking, although it's hard to tell if he's talking to anyone in particular. "The attention to detail is quite impressive. Even the surrounding air is surprisingly substantial. If that is the case, this world is in some ways more real than the real world it represents. How about you guys? What are your thoughts on this?" You guys? For a moment it feels as if he is including me in his comment. However, Leo begins speaking to my classmate, seemingly oblivious to my presence.

"Greetings. I believe this is the first time we've had an actual conversation." Leo gives a smile with no hostility. However, I have the suspicion that there is something malicious behind his smile. "Attending school wasn't half bad. I've never had the opportunity to go to one before now. In that respect, this has been quite an interesting experience… However, the time for fun has come to an end. I did not come here to play at being a student. No matter how enjoyable the detour, eventually one must return to their appointed path. And for me, the time to do so has arrived…"

With those final words, Leo turns his back on me. "Farwell. No, that's not quite right. I don't think farewell would be accurate in this situation. For reasons I cannot explain, I have the distinct feeling that we will see each other again. So I guess I should use the more congenial, 'See you later.' Well, it's time for me to move on. I wish you the best of luck."

Leo said as much, even going so far as to look in my direction… For some inexplicable reason, I'm not surprised that Leo know I was spying on him. I am trying to get things straightened out in my head when Leo suddenly… disappears. The student who was following him also disappears after touching the same spot on the wall. At the same moment he vanishes, my vision distorts and the shock threatens to overwhelm me.

What is going on here…? I wonder if this place is the source of my unease…

I come out of my hiding spot around the corner and like the two boys that disappeared, I place my hand on the wall, expecting to be drawn in. I see now that the way to the truth, to why I have these feelings, begins right here…

After touching the wall, the atmosphere changes. There's a doorway, an entrance where the concrete wall used to be. It's not something of this world. There's no doubt this door leads to someplace unfathomable. I bid farewell to the false world, and take my first step towards the truth.

* * *

An entrance to another world. Beyond that door, the previous statement perfectly describes the view before me. Walking behind me is a strange silent attendant. It looks like one of those featureless models from art class.

It is to be my sword and shield for what lies ahead… A disembodied voice suddenly confirms my thoughts. Although I have yet to learn anything, I need to do something besides stand here. At the very least, there might be some clues to this bizarre experience up ahead.

I have no choice but to head into the darkness with only this strange doll as protection.

* * *

**A/N:**

**The poll that will determine which Servant the protagonist will get is still on my profile. If anyone wants a say on the Servant for the story then vote. PM me if you have a different idea other than the choices that are listed.**

**I also won't post until I get a certain amount of votes.**


	2. Stantia (Contract)

**A/N: The results are in and the Servant has been decided.**

* * *

After walking for what seemed like forever, I came upon an area that was no longer a typical school campus. The walls and floors, the air, even the aura is slightly off.

It kind of reminds me of a video game. It wouldn't surprise me to see a monster pop out from the shadows.

_Welcome potential Master._

With a shocking suddenness, a voice begins speaking. It sounds like its coming from the empty sky above.

_If you are looking for answers, you must reach the goal. Now, please step forward._

I followed the voices instructions and proceeded forward. Along the way, I fought enemy programs that I was able to defeat with the help of my effigy. At one point, I acquired something called an Ether Shard. It's supposed to have the ability to heal injuries. However, it's limited to healing only my effigies injuries.

* * *

I proceeded to the final room.

I made it. At the end of a very long road, after going through a door that suddenly appeared in the wall… the oppressive air of this place where the spirits of the dead still linger. Here's my goal. That's what I thought. Before me stood three giant stain glass windows that looked like they belonged in a cathedral, or an old-style building.

Further in, it appears as if someone has collapsed. When I get a closer look at his face. I realize that it's the student that was following Leo before! I call out to him, but get no reply. I shake him in an attempt to wake him up when I notice… he's stone cold. I go as pale as the corpse before me, and I can no longer think coherently. All I can do is stare in bewilderment.

It is at this moment, the fallen effigy lying next to the male student comes to its feet with a clatter. After having to fight several enemy programs to get here, it's obvious that this thing is an enemy as well. Without warning, it suddenly twists around and comes right at me!

My effigy rushes to my defense and blocks the first strike aimed for my head. The two dolls seem completely identical in appearance, so they should be equal in strength shouldn't they? The battle wasn't anything for the history books that's for sure. The two simply exchange blows and blocking attacks, and neither side was taking any real damage. It seems as though this battle will either go on forever or end in a draw. However, mine is suddenly overpowered and skewered through the chest.

As my effigy fell, it felt almost as if my own body had taken the attack. My body fell to the ground along with my broken doll.

_…Hmph, you seem to be lacking as well._

…I can hear the sound of a distant voice

_The time has come. With your inevitable loss, I will consider this round of the preliminaries to be over. Farewell. I pray you'll find peace in your annihilation._

That is the voice's final words to me. I don't have the power to protest. All I can do is stare at the floor… I think I'm going to die here. Suddenly, at the edge of my now hazy vision, a number of brown colored lumps seem to rise from the ground. Actually it might be that I just noticed them now. They may have been there from the beginning for all I know. Those lumps are the bodies of an untold number of fallen Tsukumihara Academy students.

The guy before me wasn't the only one to fall. All of the others made it here and died, unable to do anything… And in a very short while, I suppose I'll become one of them.

Maybe I should just close my eyes now. I did all that I could, so maybe it'd be better for it to end now. However, I refuse to give up… I summon all off my strength in an attempt to get back on my feet. However, as I try to move, an unbearably intense pain shoots through my entire body. If that's how it's going to be… No, if this is…

I still refuse to give up. I can't give up now. Even if I'm forced to concede defeat eventually, it'd be unforgivable to do so now… I feel as if something's wrong. All of my senses grow faint. The pain running through my body has long passed my ability to endure it. I now know how the damned suffer.

Even so, I must stand.

**I want to live**

The drive to go on is something I do not understand. It's not like the fear of death is urging me not to give up. I just want to be at peace. Keeping that in mind, why am I trying with all of my might to get back on my feet? I cannot figure out the reason why. I don't know why my life needs to be ended. Why am I here…?

Another wave of pain shot through me. I understand now. That must be the reason why.

There were those many corpses. There were those many questions. Now- I can't continue without knowing. No. now that my spirit has been awakened, I cannot allow things to come to an end without knowing!

_…Hmm. As a representative of the Holy Grail, I can hardly ignore such overpowering doubt. You question your own existence even as it comes to an end, and see your own shortcomings as death approaches. Very well. I expect much from that spirit of yours. There's a Servant left that fits a human like you. A Legendary Soul that will protect the life that you so desperately wish to preserve. I look forward to your valiant efforts in battle._

The sound of breaking glass is accompanied by a light cutting through the gloom. I manage to move my weary body and aching head to see what's happening. All but one of the three stain glass window are gone. I didn't notice it before, but something was slowly rising up from the floor in the middle of the room.

Its appearance isn't much different from that of a human being with its back turned to me, but something was different. Clearly so, and it wasn't because it was covered with black armor. The power emanating from it transcended that of any human, or of any enemy I've faced in getting here. An awesome power that seems as if it'd vaporize anyone it touched swirls within my body almost against my will.

The dark figure before me turned around and spoke for the first time. "I have come in response to being summoned. Let me ask you, young lady, are you my Master?" The voice was deep, yet at the same time smooth.

All I could do is dumbly nod yes in response to his question.

"Very well then. My Master." He kneels down on one knee and bows his head. Like a knight. "From this day on, I will be your sword, and protect you from any and all enemies."

I start to take in the appearance of the being before me. He appeared to be a robust man fully clad in pitch-black armor and a rustic helmet with a thinly carved slit displaying the ghastly glow of red. That wasn't the part that stood out to me though. The part that stood out to me was that there appeared to be some sort of smoke or fog surrounding his body. Because of this, the identifying marks of his armor are hidden, only revealing the fact that he is fully clad in armor without any opening. It shows no ornaments or polished luster. Blurring the characteristic features and clues on the lineage of the maker, it makes him look like a phantom, a bottomless black darkness from the shadows. While his appearance was intimidating, I somehow knew instinctively that he would not cause me any harm.

He offers me his armor clad hand to help me to my feet. When I take accept his help, from the hand he touches comes a sudden warmth… and then a sharp pain, as if I've been cut by a knife. On the back of my hand, as though tattooed, is a strange symbol that looks like some kind of crest. Totally confused, I alternate between staring at the mark on my hand, and the person standing before me.

A noise behind me brings me back to my senses. Turning around, I see that the effigy from before is still there, now in a fighting stance. I wince uncontrollably, recalling my previous defeat at its hands.

Before I knew it, the black figure who called me Master stood between me and the effigy.

"Do not worry Master. This is an ideal chance to show that a soulless doll can't compare to the skill of a knight. Please stand back and allow me to protect you."

When the dark figure held out his hand, a black long sword suddenly appeared out of thin air. The effigy charged and slashed at the warrior protecting me. I thought that the dark knight was going to use his sword to end the fight quickly, but instead he simply countered with a punch that directly hit what could be considered the effigy's face. The effigy stammered back as if disoriented, and there was an obvious dent in the effigy's head. The effigy then charges with the same attack it used to defeat my own effigy from earlier. However, the dark warrior dodges with minimal effort and counters with a single swing of his sword which effectively slices the effigy in two.

The battered effigy stops moving. There's no way it'll still function after being sliced in two. I look to the warrior that protected me and found him staring at his hand. I suddenly understood why he didn't use his sword right away. He was testing not only his enemy's strength, but the limits of his own strength as well.

"That wasn't much of a fight, Master. However, I have some unfortunate news. I am afraid to inform you that it appears as though my powers have been put under severe restrictions." The dark knight bows his head as if in apology.

The person before me continues to talk. However, the sound of his voice doesn't quite reach my ears. The heat coming from the mark on my hand grew in intensity during the fight and the resulting pain has become unbearable and burns through my consciousness.

_The mark imprinted on your hand is your Command Seal. It is proof that you hold domination over a Servant. You can use it to give three orders that must be obeyed. Think of them as disposable strengthening spells. It is also proof of your participation in the Holy Grail War. If you lose it for some reason, you will die._

Once again, I hear that voice. I somehow manage to ignore the pain and listen to what it has to say.

_I can understand your confusion. But before I forget… Congratulations. You have endured much to make it here. Now rest for a while; you've achieved your first goal. It was an incredibly clumsy effort to say the least, but that's what made it all the more entertaining. I've had this duty for a long time, but this is the first time I've seen a Master as helpless as you. Nevertheless, be proud of your achievement. Your quick thinking came as a result of nerves and rashness._

Thinking about it, the voice sounds like that of a thirty year old man. And its irritatingly smug. For some reason, I can see the owner of the voice as a priest, dressed in a somber cassock.

_Oh, you are curious about my identity? I am honored, but I am insignificant. I am merely a part of the system. I am just a guide, tasked with giving a standard message and given the personality of a prior participant. I am no more than words, no more than the mountain you just conquered, no more than a record of the past._

A record… So if I raise any objections to this voice, does it mean I won't receive any answers in return?

_Exactly. Well… this is unexpected. You have received a commendation. Something about you "having a light."_

I have no clue who would say such a thing about me. But that short phrase struck my heart because, for some unknown reason, I knew the words were sincere. And as for 'I expect good things from you.' It seemed more of a command than an encouragement.

_Now, let us commence your baptism. You have proven yourself worthy of the honor. For most, the monotony of everyday life continues on without end. Your decision to look beyond the accepted and progress means that you have earned the right to exist. However, you have but taken the first step. Be jubilant, young knight, for the Holy Grail War begins now!_

I have no idea what he's talking about. The Holy Grail War…? The right to exist…?

_That is correct. An object of great power once existed in the world. One that could grant any desire. People called it the "Holy Grail" and fought endlessly in an attempt to gain sole possession of it. This war. This system you find yourself in now is an evolution of those struggles. You stand at the entrance of a deadly struggle where many Magi will perish in pursuit of the Holy Grail. Listen, Mage. Had I not bestowed upon the Earth desire, you'd be merely saints capable of committing sin. Now, fight to the death. The fiery throne of heaven will only receive those with the strongest of desires._

The voice reverberates throughout this hidden chapel, as if it were the voice of a god. Kill…? Magi…? Holy Grail that grants wishes…? These questions, and more, swirl inside my head and almost seem to carve themselves into my flesh.

_In war, a weapon is needed. That is your Servant. They're the spear that pierces, the shield that protects. A Legendary Soul whose purpose is to clear your way to the Grail. That is one who stands beside you._

I glance over at the dark knight standing next to me who has continued to remain silent. This person is my Servant…

_It seems you have decided, and with that decision as payment, I now open the gates to the Holy Grail War._

The marks on my hand, my Command Seal, once again begin to become excruciatingly painful. It's over. I can't take it anymore. I collapsed. I reach the limits of my endurance and my mind starts to shut down. As I lose consciousness, I can vaguely hear the voice's final words.

_Now, let the Holy Grail War Begin. No matter the era, deciding who is worthy through battle is the divine providence of man. Magi who have been invited here by the Moon; show me your strength!_

The last thing I am aware of is someone holding me in their arms.

* * *

**_What I seek is a shadow that doesn't sway._**

**_What I'm searching for is an illuminated escape._**

**_What I gave you was my habitual sadness._**

* * *

**A/N: Please be kind and review. This is also my fist time writing a fight scene.**


	3. Juratus (Sworn Loyalty)

**A/N:** Poll Open: Should I keep the relationship between my MC and her Servant professional throughout the story, or should they develop romantic feelings for each other?

Poll available on my profile.

* * *

**_The mire of the everyday sloughs off._**

**_A war between magi._**

**_The wheel of fate turns._**

**_Weak one, temper your sword,_**

**_and defend the value of your life._**

* * *

_The sky burns._

_Houses collapse into ruin._

_People fall to the ground._

_Roads come to an end._

_The conflict started here. The world that was will be restored._

_It is here that "I" alone had survived._

_Don't remember/__**Never forget**__. Oblivion is salvation and sin. Never forget._

_"I" was born from perdition._

_This must be a nightmare. This had to be somewhere; it could be anywhere, these events that occurred in the true memories of childhood._

_The torrent of blood flows, and a voice resonating with bitter resentment can be heard._

_Lives fade away without a thought. Friends, family, strangers. All gone. Soldiers with guns, families trying to hold together, a grotesque struggle to the last, until a gentle peace descends as death comes to claim them._

_I could not accept all I have seen. The question of "why?" never left me._

_Even with the divide between conflict and catastrophe, why did such a tragedy occur?_

_No, more importantly… Why has this world been turned into a hell on Earth?_

_…A gentle rain begins to fall. All things once living fade away, leaving only one behind._

_Amidst the helplessness and despair, their soul's last feelings are of rage and regret._

_The rain wets their cheeks as their eyes close one last time, dying forgotten and alone._

_Seeing this, I struggle to rise from the depths of death. I will not accept what I have been shown._

_If I can live again, I will definitely… _

_But there are no second chances. And before long, the rain has cleansed the scorched earth._

_Never forget._

_"I" was born from perdition._

_What that means…_

_Somehow, please don't forget it._

* * *

…It seems I saw some sort of twisted, distorted dream.

With that, I wake up in one of the beds in the nurse's office. The midday sun is illuminating the room and the sound of birds can be heard outside. I must have collapsed and was brought here. So, was that world, the effigy that almost killed me, that Servant that protected me… all a dream as well? If it was all just a dream then I should hurry up and get back to class…

No, after taking a second glance I notice that the nurse's office is far different from the one I knew. It's similar, but off somehow…

"At last you have awakened."

The overwhelming, unforgettable presence of someone suddenly appears beside my bed. It's the same man from before, still clad in that eerie dark armor. He is currently kneeling on one knee with his head bowed down. Even while kneeling I can tell that he is significantly taller than the average human.

"I hope that your rest has replenished your strength, Master. And seeing as your wounds have healed, you now appear healthy enough to participate in the Holy Grail War. However; I would assume you are aware of what the Holy Grail is correct?" The dark knight looks up at me and his deep voice slightly echoes within his helmet.

I sit up in the bed and reply as best as I can. "I think I understand the basic outline of it. It is a wish granting device that is given to the last person standing at the end. The war for the Grail takes place virtually on something called the MoonCell. Right?"

"That explanation will suffice. Then are you aware of what a Servant is?"

"Uh… That's what you are… right?" I couldn't think of a better way to put it. All I know is what that strange voice told me after the dark knight in front of me first appeared.

"Yes, that is correct. Allow me to introduce myself properly. I am Saber, a Servant summoned to this realm to serve as your sword and shield in the Holy Grail War, my Master." He bowed his head again, like a knight before a king.

I started to feel kind of embarrassed by him calling me his _'Master'_. "You don't have to keep calling me Master. My name is Ailita Furude, so you can just call me Ailita."

"As you wish, Lady Ailita." Something tells me that's as close to a compromise as I was going to get with this guy.

"You don't have to be so formal. By the way… I don't mean to be rude, but 'Saber' is kind of an unusual name."

"The truth is that Saber is not my true name."

"Huh…? If Saber isn't your real name then why do you call yourself that?"

"Servants are Heroic Spirits made into special familiars that are bound to the one who summoned them, called Masters. Heroic Spirits are beings that accomplished great achievements such as saving the world and, after their death, became the object of worship and lore. Heroic Spirits summoned by the Holy Grail are place into one of seven classes. The seven standard classes are Lancer, Archer, Rider, Caster, Assassin, Berserker and Saber. Lancer class Servants are very agile and skilled with long-range melee weapons, such as spears, lances, etc. Servants within the Archer class are usually proficient with projectiles and can survive longer without a Master nearby, thanks to their special ability Independent Action; the strongest Archers can be difficult to control at times, in fact, due to their near-total independence from their "Masters". Rider class Servants place emphasis upon speed and powerful Noble Phantasms, which often include their mounts. Their special skill is Riding, which allows them to fully utilize abilities of their mounts which can range from simple horses to mechanical vehicles to divine or supernatural creatures. Servants placed within the Caster class are adept in magecraft and have a special ability akin to Reality Marble, called Territory Creation, which alters or creates space around them to enhance their sorcery. Assassin. These Servants are known to be specialized killers. The Assassins' special ability is 'Presence Concealment', which allows them to remain undetected. Offset by their stealth is their weak combat skills. Due to this, Assassins often target Masters instead of Servants. Berserker class Servants are always heroes who have gone berserk in their lifetime. This trait allows them to use the special ability 'Mad Enhancement', which trades their sanity for a large power boost. Most Masters are incapable of controlling their Servant once Mad Enhancement has been activated, which eventually results in their death. And finally, the Saber class. Servants placed within this class are agile and powerful melee warriors. It is commonly assumed to be the best class overall, with high ratings in all parameters. It also possesses the Riding skill like the Rider class. Because I fall under the Saber class I shall go by the name, Saber."

My head started to spin at all of the new words that were being thrown at me. I got up to sit on the bed. My gaze then drifted to the strange marking on the back of my hand.

"Do these markings on my hand have anything to do with me being a Master?"

Saber raises his head again. "That is correct. Those markings are called Command Seals and they are proof that you are a Master. The seals are three absolute orders that can either restrain or reinforce the action of a Servant, to the point of making it perform an otherwise impossible action. However, as soon as you use your last Command Seal your life will be terminated by the MoonCell, so I would advise you to use them wisely. Also, I give you my word that I would never disobey you even without the Command Seals. "

At least that explanation wasn't as lengthy. However, there is one question that Saber seems to be avoiding.

"If all Servants Heroic Spirits, then what was your true name in life?"

"…" Saber goes silent, and with his helmet covering his face it's impossible to tell what he is thinking. After what seemed like an eternity of silence, he gives his reply. "The true name of a Servant is something vital to battle, as it can reveal much about them. It can reveal certain traits about their abilities, allowing for specific countermeasures, and there are many famous heroes that had met untimely deaths in life. Those killed by poison will be more susceptible to it, those shot down by arrows will be weak against them, and those with weak spots will be severely disadvantaged. There are also things like the traits of a dragon being weak against dragon-slaying weapons, and even without such a specific countermeasure, releasing that information to the other Masters can allow for other countermeasures."

This is starting to get annoying. "I understand what you are saying, but wouldn't it be more of an advantage for the Master to understand the Heroic Spirit they have been partnered with?"

Saber took another long pause to counter my statement. "Please note that despite the origins of the term 'hero', Heroic Spirits are not bound to the common understanding of the word. There are Heroic Spirits that have been remembered throughout the ages for crimes they have committed, thus there are Servants that are unable to hold their heads high as heroes."

This time I was the one who was left speechless.

Saber once again averted his gaze and I noticed he clenched his fists as if remembering something painful. "I am the alienated, the ridiculed, the despised. No need to praise my name. I am the shadow under the radiance of heroic spirits. Birthed of the darkness of glorious legend. Nourished by the sighs of the people precipitated within the darkness, people that curse the light. This is my disgrace. Because of a certain person's unsullied glory, I must forever be belittled."

Words are unable to describe the melancholy and self-loathing I heard in his voice.

With that, my Servant stands up and disappears into thin air. However, I can still feel his presence nearby. "Even if you can't see me, I'll be by your side to protect you. I am merely staying out of sight when I am not needed so my identity will not be revealed to any of the Masters on campus."

How his identity could be guessed by his appearance alone is beyond me. For now I'll drop the subject about who he is for now.

I stand up and start to walk to the center of the nurse's office when the door opened, revealing Sakura Matou.

"Ah, Ailita. You're finally awake? I'm so relieved." She greets me with a friendly smile. "You don't seem to have any injuries, so feel free to leave when you feel like it. Also, all of your memories have been restored by .PH. so do not worry. Any magi that seek the Holy Grail have their memories suppressed and are given those of a student. Only Masters who have managed to recover themselves are allowed to enter the main tournament. Now that you have regained your memories, please review them to make sure they're complete."

Regained my memories? "Something's not right. Outside of my name, I can't recall anything of my past. I realized that everyone around me was forced to believe they were normal students… However, I can't remember a single thing that happened to me before then!"

Sakura looks shocked at my reply. "Your memory restoration failed? I am afraid I cannot help you. I, Sakura Matou, am just a custodial AI."

My complaints were totally ignored. It seems she can't act beyond her programing.

"Oh, I should give this to you before I forget." She gives me some kind of portable terminal. I assume it's for getting messages and whatnot. "As a participant, you should pay attention to any messages that appear on your terminal."

Sakura may be nice, but she currently isn't much help. I decided to go look around the school to see if there is some one that can help me.

* * *

**_What are carried out, are the thoughts of happiness._**

**_What are avoided, are the promises between friends._**

**_What are left, are the moments of confusion._**


	4. Constantiae (Perseverance)

**A/N: New poll open. When it gets to the point where I have to decide to save either Rin or Rani, which one should I save?**

**Poll available on my profile.**

* * *

**Morning**

Not knowing where to even begin to start looking for answers, I just wander around the building to get a feel for my surroundings. It turns out it's exactly like the school I have grown accustomed to over the past week. I still couldn't see Saber, but I could tell he was still somewhere nearby watching over me and prepared to defend me. This fact didn't make me feel any less uncomfortable with my current situation. It was just too surreal to believe. It almost made me want to believe that I'm trapped in a bad dream.

After finally exploring just about every inch of the school, I walk outside to get some juice from a vending machine and sit down on a nearby bench to collect my thoughts. I asked Saber if he wanted anything to drink, but he politely refused. In contrast to my distressed state, the other students that managed to become Masters seemed to be in high spirits for making it through the preliminary round. However, this is a very slim fraction of the number of students that were originally on campus.

With nothing better to do, I decide to examine the Terminal I received from Sakura earlier. After getting a feel for how to use it, I noticed there was a section on my Servant's parameters.

Strength: E

Endurance: E

Agility: E

Mana: E

Luck: E

"I'm in no way an expert on The Holy Grail War, Servants, or combat, but I'm pretty sure that from what I'm seeing, Saber's abilities probably won't compare to some of the other Servants." I then remember Saber saying that his powers were put under severe restrictions. If that's true then how strong was he originally? And more importantly, is it possible to regain that strength?

"My apologies for my current abilities not meeting your expectations, Lady Ailita. "

I jump slightly when Saber's sudden comment snaps me out of my thoughts. I look around frantically, but my dark knight still can't be seen. I suddenly feel guilty for forgetting he was there for a moment, and saying something that insulting in front of him. I was about to apologize until a voice that was _intentionally_ insulting interrupted me.

"Well if it ain't Ailita. I can't believe such a boring person like you actually made it through the prelims." My feelings instantly change from guilty to really irritated as I look to my right to see the owner of the voice. Sure enough, that obnoxiously arrogant voice belongs to the schools most popular seaweed-head, Shinji Matou. He has purple, wavy hair, and wears a purple dress shirt beneath his tan school uniform jacket. I remember that Shinji was one of my classmates during the preliminary rounds. He was very popular with the girls in our class, although the reason why is beyond me. He is also such a megalomaniac that if he gets an answer wrong in class, he would claim that the question was wrong instead of him.

"So you're a mage too. I couldn't feel you're presence so I completely forgot about you." Shinji sits down next to me while he continued to run his mouth. "Those prelims sure were a pain to get through though. Of course, it's no surprise I made it, being the naturally gifted genius that I am. But someone like you surviving is a miracle. That makes us the only two people in our class to become Masters."

Doesn't this guy have anything better to do? However, if what he's saying is true, then that means that most of his fan club is gone. I wonder if that's the reason he came over to bother me, but unfortunately for him my standards are not that low. I stay quiet and just tune him out while I finish my juice in the hope that if I do he'll take the hint that I don't give a damn about what he says and just leave me alone. Unfortunately, it's taking _a long time_ for him to notice that I want him to leave. He doesn't even seem to notice that I'm not even paying attention. I did hear him say something like how through his genius skills he discovered how to enter the war, how he didn't expect to lose his memory for the preliminary rounds, and because of his amazing hacker skills he can mess with some of the data in the system. After what felt like an eternity, Shinji stood up to walk away. However, he decided to leave a final remark.

"Alright. This is it. From here on out, what's at stake is the Holy Grail. The other Masters may have started this war, but I'll be the one to come out on top. After all, my Servant _is_ the strongest so there's no way I'd lose. I would tell you good luck because we're friends, but luck won't help you win this game." And with that Shinji _finally_ decided to leave me alone. With him gone thing started to become much more peaceful.

Hold on a second… Since when did he start calling me his friend?

* * *

After dealing with Shinji's monologue, I decided to head up to the roof of the school to clear my head. When I reach the top of the stairs I find the entire rooftop to be vacant. Now that I have a good view of the entire area, it almost seems like the entire school is submerged underwater. If I look above me, I don't see a sky with clouds, instead I see a sea filled with 1s and 0s. It's just another reminder that I'm not in the real world. On the bright side, it's nice and peaceful up on the roof. Being alone once and a while can be pretty relaxing.

Actually, that's not quite right. I'm _not_ currently alone. That thought reminded me of something else I needed to do.

"Saber, are you there?" The moment I say that, Saber materializes in front of me.

"Yes, Lady Ailita. Is there something you require of me?" He puts his hand over his chest and gives a slight bow. It made me think that his polite mannerisms completely contradict with his menacing appearance.

"I told you before that you don't have to be so formal to me." No matter what it's still kind of hard to get used to just how polite he is. Maybe it's because I'm so used to Shinji being an ass all the time that interacting with someone with such good manners feels unnatural. Then again, Leo has pretty good manners. However, Leo give off the feeling that he belongs at the top and is looking down on everyone else and makes me feel somewhat uneasy. Saber gives a more humble and less oppressive feeling.

"My apologies, Milady, but as a knight and your Servant I find it only natural to be courteous to my Lady and Master." This guy really isn't going to budge on this issue is he? Well, it's not like I _hate_ it, so I guess I can live with it.

"Well, that issue aside. The reason a called you out is because I wanted to apologize for what I said earlier. The comment about your skills. I didn't mean to say that out loud." I know it might seem minor, but I did feel bad thinking that I might have insulted the person who claimed they would protect me.

"Think nothing of it. I apologize for my current skills not meeting your expectations."

"Y-You don't have to apologize for that. I don't think it's really your fault. I remember you said your powers were restricted so…" Saber suddenly turned to face the door that we had just come out of. "Saber? Is something wrong?"

"Stay on your guard. Another Master is approaching." As soon as Saber finishes talking he disappears, making it seem like I'm the only one on the roof again.

The door opened and a girl came out. She has long black hair styled into twin-tails and aqua eyes. Her clothes consist of a red turtleneck, a black skirt and she wears long black boots. Only one person I know fits that description. Rin Tohsaka. I heard that she's Miss Popular for being pretty and really smart. I've never talked to her though, so I don't really have an opinion on her.

Right now I'm not sure what to make of her. She's just walking around, patting the walls and floors, and talking to herself.

"I've investigated this school from top to bottom, but there's nothing unique about it. Huh? Hey, you over there." She calls out to me when she realizes that she's not alone on the roof. Normally I would think nothing of it, but right now we are in the middle of a battlefield and she could possibly be my enemy. When I don't move she decides to come closer. "Yeah, you. Hmm, I haven't really checked the NPCs yet. I know a simple way. Don't you move." Getting into my personal space, she reaches out and touches my cheek. "Imagine that. You're warm, though you shouldn't be. Huh? That's weird, seeing a cheek blush like that." Her face is now three centimeters from mine. Right now I'm too shocked by her sudden behavior to anything. She then does a light pat-down of my shoulders and stomach. All I can say is that I'm thankful that there is no one else on the roof right now. I think I'd die of embarrassment if anyone saw what Rin was dong to me. "Interesting. You're more well build than I had expected. You look and feel real. Maybe more real than most people." She suddenly stops talking to turn around. "Hey, what are you laughing at? It's to our advantage to look into everything, even the NPCs." Rin scowls and starts yelling at the space behind her. That must be where her Servant is. She then turns back around franticly. "Huh? She's a Master too? No way… a Master should be more… W-Wait. That means I just felt up-!" Realizing her mistake, Rin freaks out and her face is starting to match her shirt. "This is so embarrassing. Shut up! Even I make mistakes! Don't call me a pervert because you have no room to talk!" Rin then starts shouting at her Servant behind her. I think I have a pretty good idea what was being said. "Anyway, this is your fault too."

"Um… I would say I'm the victim in this situation. How exactly is this _my_ fault?" I decide to finally break my silence.

"It's because you're too bland to anything but an NPC. Even now there's nothing but a blank look on your face. Were the prelims too boring to jog your memories?" That's when she finally got to the main reason behind my current stress.

"Actually… my memories still haven't returned."

"Are you serious? That's… really bad. Once you enter the Holy Grail War, the only way out is to be the last person standing. Even without memories, or previous battle experience, you still have to fight. Oh well. At least it will be one less challenge for me."

Ok… That was cold. There wasn't even a once of concern in her voice. But then again, why should she care? We are all enemies in this war. And a severely handicapped Master like me probably isn't considered much of a threat to her.

"Lady Ailita. Do not take that girl's words to heart. She has never seen our fight, so she her assumption that we are incompetent is unjustified." Saber's words manage to make Rin's words somewhat sting less.

"Well… I guess I pity you. I wonder if your personal data was messed up on your way from the prelims. Well, in any case, you don't look like you're cut out for fighting. By the way, I'm Rin Tohsaka."

"I'm Ailita Furude." After I've introduced myself to one of my possibly future enemies, I turn around to leave.

So, I really have lost my memories. All I currently know is that I am a Master with Saber as my Servant at my command. I don't know who I am. I don't know my past. I don't even know why I entered this war. However, **I don't want to die.** So no matter what, **I will win this war.**

* * *

**What you'll eliminate, **

**is the fragrance of memory.**

**What you'll see, **

**are the scars of hatred.**

**What you'll hear, **

**are the echoes of footsteps from the past.**


End file.
